Dr J's Sex Facts

Fun sex facts and accurate information from a clinical sexologist for a hotter and more fulfilling sex life.

Thursday, May 03, 2007

A New Lesson: Eroticizing Your Whole Body

“I consider sex a misdemeanor; the more I miss, de meaner I get.”
Mae West


Welcome New Readers!

As regular readers can attest, you may find this blog a bit different from others because my intention is to be both entertaining and educational. Each new post is based on information presented in the previous one; so to get the maximum benefit, I recommend you begin with the introductory post from August and read forward from there.


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What's your disability? The truth is that all of us have at least one—even though it may be hidden—because even small things can inhibit our basic sexual functions. Some of us may have an old knee injury that prevents us from being on top for extended periods, or perhaps there’s an old scar that never healed right and tingles when we touch it—yes, we’ve all been there. Even if our own disabilities aren’t quite as obvious as those of someone in a wheelchair, for example, they still affect us.

Illness and injury may leave us with reduced sensation and mobility, things which by themselves or added to a growing litany of other aches, pains and changes can affect our sexual function. People with limited sensation or mobility have learned to focus on the parts that do have sensation and in so doing are actually able to redefine their sexuality according to their capabilities. The bottom line here is that people can actually transfer erotic feelings to those locations that still have sensation. It seems old dogs CAN learn new tricks after all!

So what can we with our “hidden disabilities” learn from our less-abled brothers and sisters? First, don’t be so crotch-focused; second, learn to be more sensual. Let yourself become “whole body sexual,” and don’t ignore your neck (yum!), ears (oooh!), shoulders (aaaah!), legs (that tickles!), back (mmmm!), etc. Have you ever had someone gently nibble your back or the inside of your thighs when you’re just beginning to get aroused? Or has a sexual partner ever bitten you while you were REALLY turned on? (Yes, please!)


Isn’t it inspiring that people can actually overcome a variety of barriers in order to experience the different possible sensations that let them feel pleasure? The good news is that we all have an abiding WILL to be sexual; it’s a need in everyone.

And for those among you just waiting to crow, “But I don’t have any physical limitations,” don’t forget that if we’re lucky enough to live to a ripe old age, we’ll ALL be facing these challenges some day. Look me up when you get there. I’ll be the outrageous 90-year-old red hot mama ridin’ a radical rocking chair, sippin’ a charming chardonnay and talkin’ sassy about sex.

Here’s an excellent article about sexual options (including sex toys) for various challenging physical conditions by the noted disability sexual rights activist Dr. Linda Mona:
http://www.mypleasure.com/education/sexed/getting_assistance.asp

As always, the doctor is in, and I welcome your comments and questions.

With Pleasure,
Dr. J


3 Comments:

  • At 9:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hi dr. J, i post a comment in Sept few days ago and not sure if you read it. it is in there. let me know. thanks.

     
  • At 1:43 PM, Blogger Dr J said…

    Hi. I checked all my September posts and don't find any unanswered comments. Can you please resend to this week's post? I'd love to hear from you. Dr. J

     
  • At 1:51 PM, Blogger Dr J said…

    Hi again. I just found your comment in October 26 post and answered it. Dr. J.

     

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